Everyone wants to make a difference. We want to know that others value what we do.  We want to be liked.  So we try to be nice to others and show them we can be a trusted friend who can make a difference in their lives.

But too often something goes wrong.  We get blamed for something we didn't do or didn't mean to do.  After all, what we intend to do is who we are. And we believe others should be able to figure this out.  When they don't and the problem continues, the easiest course of action is to move away and stick with other friends who agree that we were not treated well.

This happens often and to everyone, and with the same outcome: We subdivide into groups who think and behave as we do.  But this is rarely helpful.  Holding a grudge has no lasting benefit, and when we narrow our lives, we reduce our chance to make new friends.  We miss out on being part of all that is going on around us.  We miss out on new ideas, new thoughts, new opinions.  We can say this doesn't matter, but we do miss out.  To make a difference, we need to understand others, listen to their views, and explain ours.  Through this exchange, we cannot help but be wiser, more tolerant, and better able to help others.  As a result, those who previously rejected us may say, "You know, this guy is not that bad after all!"

So where am I going with this?  Why am I writing this blog on making a difference?  Because I believe so strongly that everyone can make a difference.  No two people are alike, and at some point we all have ideas that might make a real difference to someone else.  Everyone has this potential. The shame is that too often we make decisions and take actions that make it difficult for others to listen to us.  In later blogs, I want to focus on poor decisions we all make. I've already mentioned one: reducing one's circle of friends.  It's a mistake I made.  But it's a mistake I corrected.  And the result is that I now explore my ideas with exciting people I would have otherwise never known.  I love what is happening.

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